One evening while out strollin' a friendI chanced to seeHe was begging behind a bottleOn Spring and BoweryHe said, "I got some news for youOnly cost a couple of bobAbout a buried treasureBack home in BallydehobWell, I gave him all the bucks I hadAnd he took me by the handI know you love musiciansI've got news to beat the bandFor back there in me native townIn the Allied Irish BankThe long lost tapes of HendrixAre hidden in the vaultYou can talk about your pyramidsAnd your pints of Guinness stoutBut the long lost tapes of HendrixWill leave them in the dirtSo I stole me boss's credit cardTo the airport I did jogVery soon thereafterI arrived in BallydehobWhen I hit the Allied Irish meFatigue turned to desireI beheld two hundred poundsOf sweet Maggie McGuireShe cast her eyes upon me"what are you doin' in me bank?"I'm here on a secret mission, dollOh no, not another YankI hate the very sight of yezApart from your presidentThat man can stimulate meAny way he wantsWhat are you doin' later?Yera, I'm not up to muchWould you care for a pint of Guinness?I never touch the stuffBut one pint led to two or threeSix to seven or eightUntil I was shakin' hands with meselfAnd that girl was feelin' no painShe was startin' to look beautifulThough there was three of her in sightSix hundred pounds of lovin'What do you have in mind?Oh, sweet Maggie MagurieThere's one thing I'd adoreTo go down to the vault of your bankAnd do it on the floorNo bother, a stÃ³rThat's easily arrangedSo we stole into the bankAnd down the creaky stairsSoon we were insideThe vault and dentin' the very floorI could see the tapes of HendrixAnd they hidden behind the doorI never had such a night of loveShe knew every trick in the bookOver, under, sidewaysBy the mornin' I was shookWhen she finally keeled overI gently moved her weightWith her snores wakin' the very deadI headed for the tapesThen all at onceA big white flash took me by surpriseAn apparition in tie-dyeArose before me eyesA curly headed black manExploded in the lightT'was the ghost of Jimi HendrixAnd him playin' the Uilleann pipesI woke up in the hospitalA weddin' ring on me handTwo hundred pounds of Maggie McGuireSmilin' to beat the bandOh, you're so romanticNo engagement did I needJust one mad night of blisterin' sexBrought me to my kneesSo now I live in BallydehobWhere the rain pours down all weekI'm nearly faded away from tendin'To Maggie McGuire's needsThe moral of this story isDon't ever find your dreamsAnd keep away from HendrixAnd his goddamn bloody tapesYou can talk about your pyramidsAnd your pints of Guinness stoutBut the long lost tapes of HendrixWill leave them in the dirt
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