After dinner Norman becomes depressed.[Star]Norman's office got on my nerves to-day.[Wife]What do you mean? You are Norman![Star](Shouts) I am a star![Wife]You're not a star Norman. You'reJust a plain ordinary little bloke andEven if you walked down the street inA silver suit people still wouldn'tRecognize you. You're dull, ordinaryAnd uninteresting! You're a drag!Star rises from his chair and smashesThe dinner plates to the floor.[Star]I hate this house and I hate you, butMore than anything else I hate thoseDucks![Wife]Don't you touch those ducks Norman!They were a present from my mother.Look, Norman, I've had enough of youAnd your ridiculous fantasies. First ofAll you wanted to be a painter, thenYou wanted to be an astronaut, thenA footballer and now you're playing atBeing a rock singer. If you touch thoseDucks I'm leaving!Ducks On The WallMy baby's got the most deplorable taste,But her biggest mistakeIs hanging over the fireplace.She's got ducks, ducks on the wall,Ducks, ducks, hanging on the wall.My lady's got a sort of strange fascination,An obsessive fixationFor cheap decorationsShe's got ducks, ducks on the wall.Ducks, ducks, hanging on the wall.Wo-wo-wo I love her so but if she doesn't move the ducks,I think my mind is gonna go.Ducks ducks on the wall.Ducks ducks, hanging on the wall.I leave the office and I want to relax.Don't want to stare at a wallAnd look at a duck that can't quack.I love you baby but I can't fallFor those ducks on the wall.I start to snuggle up and squeeze her so tight.Then out of the corner of my eyeI see those ducks in flight.I love you baby but I can't ballWhen I see those ducks on the wall.Wo-wo-wo I can sit through your gossip and your soap opera shows,But those ducks have got to go.I love you baby but I can't ballWhen I see those ducks on the wall.And when I went to a cocktail partyWith the bores next door,What was the first thing that I saw?Ducks, ducks on the wall.Ducks, ducks hanging on the wall.My baby's got the most deplorable taste,But her biggest mistakeIs hanging over the fireplace.She's got ducks, ducks on the wall,Ducks, ducks hanging on the wall.I'll sit and look at all the soap operas with herI'll play all the panel games and watch all the quiz shows,But those ducks they've got to go,Those ducks are getting up my nose.If those ducks can fly, well so can I.And if those ducks have got to stayThen I'm going to fly away.I love you baby but I can't ballWhen I see those ducks on the wall.Ducks, ducks, ducks on the wall.Ducks, ducks, ducks on the wall.Oh those ducks on the wall are beginning to moveThey're talking to meI've got to get away from those ducks.
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